Covenant Presbyterian Church

Man is a hider. Sin makes men averse to light, to exposure, to honesty. Like Adam and Eve, he runs from the presence of God, from the penetrating light of his presence and word, from seeing who he really is. He hates transparency. Were it not for the arresting light of the gospel of grace, man would hide all the way to hell, never knowing or wanting to know the true nature of his heart until forced to face it before the uncovering gaze of God’s judgment. Thus, it is a great mercy for God to shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of his glory. It is more than a little painful, to be sure, for each of us establishes deceptive internal security measures to keep from being exposed. We practice these outwardly, hiding behind pleasant words, in our comfortable, isolated suburban homes, not wanting to get too close to others lest they discover the password of our lives that will let them in to see what is really there. But God will not let his children remain hidden. He reveals himself to us, and in so doing reveals us. Man cannot truly know himself until he knows God. He will not face himself until he has faced the living God.
Facing God is never comfortable. Even the greatest men and women of Scripture were almost undone in the confrontation. Manoah and his wife thought they would die because they had seen God. Moses was shaken to the core of his being so much so that he remained in hiding until driven back to Egypt by God. Isaiah was immediately aware of his unclean lips. Paul was similarly unhinged, his whole life’s purpose suddenly and decisively exposed as nothing but self-serving treason against the God of heaven. Even the beloved disciple, after years of serving Christ, fell down like a dead man before his glory. But God’s intent in revealing himself to us is not to destroy us but to free us - from the dominion and delusion of sin, from self-delusion, from fear of man, and from any other life than one lived in enjoyment of his presence and love. He also shows himself to us that we may begin to walk with him in integrity - moral wholeness, personal honesty, and public transparency. He knows that our hiding is ultimately rooted in a great lie, the idea that we define ourselves and are accountable to none but ourselves. And so God finds and exposes us, thus bringing the liberation of integrity.
Men of integrity are created by the revelation of God’s glory in the depth of their soul. It is a glory that burns away our self-delusional lies and self-preserving myths - about who we are, about who God is, and about how we should live in the world. The revelation of God’s glory, especially his love, grace, goodness, truth, and holiness, does not bring us down but lifts us up. It hauls our consciences before his throne, lays us completely open to his gaze, and declares with saving power that our game of hide-and-seek is mercifully at an end. There is no longer any reason to hide. God has covered our sins through Jesus Christ. There is no need to pretend. Our righteousness is filthy; he alone is good and beautiful. There is no need to continue the personal public relations charade. He knows us. And because he knows us, we are freed to be men and women of integrity. No more games, hidden agendas, self-serving paradigms of human relationships. But understand, there can be no integrity unless we are burned out by the glory of God, refined, purified, and cleansed. Until this happens, we will continue to play the grand cover-up game, trying to convince ourselves and others that we are something different and better than what we in fact are.
And so, I am increasingly convinced that what really counts in this life is character, and more specifically, integrity. Integrity is evidence that a man has been found by God. Give me a man who speaks plainly, without exaggeration, self-aggrandizement, or drama, and I will find in him a friend who has been freed from the desire to present himself as anything else than man who has seen the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ, who has been made honest by the fire of divine truth. Give me a man who wears his beliefs on his sleeve, who is not covering a hidden agenda or using his relationships to further his own private ends, who is willing to give his opinion humbly even if he is unsure that it agrees with mine, and I will consider him trustworthy, no man’s slave, a potential ally, one who has been freed from the vicious cycle of trying to create a life story in which everything revolves around him. Give me a man who does not hide his faults, who is humble and open, whose only boast is the mercy of God through the cross of Jesus Christ, and I will show you someone bold as a lion, fearless of man, broken before God, and a friend of all who seek the truth as it is in Jesus. Such a man does not have to hold all doctrinal points in common with me, or agree with my politics, or think just like me. What unites men lastingly is integrity based upon common exposure before God. Yes, we will love truth together, be concerned about similar things, and be committed to the Church of Jesus Christ. But the tie that binds is the glory of God revealed in the face of Jesus Christ, savingly revealed, a soul scorched with the majesty of the triune God.

Of course, integrity is never perfect in this life, even among the best of men. There is a demon dwelling in us all, the root and remnant of our sinful nature and contagion. Our Savior deals with it decisively, to be sure, breaking its dominion, but he does not completely remove it. His grace does not perfect me immediately; instead it calls and empowers me to fight against the world, the flesh, and the devil. I, like you, struggle with integrity, with being open, transparent, and consistent, with being on the inside whom we purport to be on the outside, and vice versa. Total integrity awaits heaven. Until it dawns, you and I must fight for it, constantly, tirelessly, and tenaciously. Unless it grows in us, our relationships are doomed, our Savior is dishonored, and the world stands back in mockery at our high and lofty claims.

Integrity will struggle in a culture in which image is everything. When image is everything and salesmanship supreme, men hide what they really are behind words, self-promotion, and declarations of good will covering evil intentions. When image is everything, everyone claims sincerity, but it is only the appearance of sincerity; beware of men who are always claiming to be sincere. Sincerity is not proven by words but by a life of painful honesty and broken openness. When image is everything, what counts is not the truth but how others perceive me, what I am selling. We see how this is damaging the Church. Preachers are carrying on private internet lives and dalliances with similarly deluded members of their congregations, all the while promoting themselves and their "vision" in the name of God. Christian young people also lead double lives, saying on their blogs what is truly within their hearts while telling their parents and pastors that everything is going real well. Husbands and wives build beautiful facades between themselves, refuse to speak the truth about themselves even though their spouses know it very well, and fail to be broken together before God. In the broader culture, the constant round of entertainment offerings performed by men and women who only know the mask of fantasy, artificial beauty, and staged goodness, of sporting feats performed by self-deluded athletes, of promises made by politicians whose only desire is to retain power, of consumerism promoted by corporations who would have you believe that their products will make you a better, more fulfilled person - live in this world of lies, dear Christian, and it cannot but rub off on you, deepening your darkness and deception, or at least dulling the truth by the influence of the shiny.

Yet integrity will not only survive but also prevail. Lies have a short shelf life. They are based upon nothing, like building one’s life upon the claims of Mormonism, Hinduism, Jehovah’s Witnesses, Darwinianism, Islam, Post-modernism and Afro-centrism - all palaces of air, life based upon lies, grandiose claims with nothing supporting them but self-deception. If the Church of our dear Savior is to live and overcome, we must be men and woman of integrity. We must be often before the throne of God, remembering and worshipping his penetrating omniscience of me, having sin burned away before his loving countenance and saving grace, honestly facing who we are in the light of who he is. Nothing else will make us honest and open before men, bold in a righteous cause, enable us to speak the truth even when it puts us in a bad light, present ourselves truthfully, warts and all, and turn from salesmanship in our personal relationships that we might boast in only one thing - the cross of our Savior, by which the world has been crucified to us and we to the world. Be often with God. Walk in the light of his knowledge of you. Be honest before him. He will break you that he might lift you up. Do not hide, child of God, run to the light. O, it burns, but it also heals. It exposes, but how it emboldens. It alone will end the hiding game in your life.